DISTRESSED_DAMSEL: Single princess seeking rescue. I’m currently being held captive in a tower defended by a molten lava moat and possibly an enchanted riddle or three. Exact details about my imprisonment aren’t important, but I will say it has been far too long since a knight has attempted to scale these walls and free me. A bit more about myself: Before I was locked away, my ideal Sunday involved frequenting the market run by the local farmers, then trekking across the hillside before retiring to the castle to pop open a skin of wine. I know this is a silly way to meet someone (we maidens all hope to find our Prince Charming through chance), but I believe in love and I’m ready to be rescued. I’m not just looking for a hero; I’m looking for a best friend. SHININGKNIGHT85: My dear Damsel, A carrier pigeon brought this parchment and I must say your letter truly spoke to me. And I am not just referring to the beauty of your attached portrait (by the way,
Over-caffeinated and underpaid. Go America. Go Dodgers.