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In the year 2000....

We were waiting in line for Bill Clinton tickets last Monday, and since there was a moritorium on Assassins, boredom set it. So we did the only thing that bored college students with pens and paper could....we played MASH. I know what you're thinking: Isn't that game meant for 6th graders on 2 hour bus rides to the aquarium for a field trip? I like to think that MASH fits well for any line in which FastPass is not an option.
A lot of people have postulated as to my future. Some have predicted that I'll end up rich, famous and alone. Others have predicted that I'll end up in a ditch after offending the wrong minority. So allow me to stop the guessing game and give you my MASHIP'd future:
I'll be living in an igloo, married to Emmy Rossum and we'll have 2.5 kids. I'll be working as a Naval Aviator and I'll drive a Diet Pepsi Truck to work everyday.
Yup. Future's not going to be too bad. Only problem is that these results confuse me a tad. For the past 2 years, Ms. Carrie Underwood has exclusively been referred to as "The future Mrs. Davison." But now that I know that I'll be spending my days with the talented star of Phantom of the Opera, do I have to find a new moniker for Carrie? Do I give up on my dream of settling down with a country music star? Maybe I should convince Sarah to do another MASH and answer these questions. But then my destiny might end up being in a Shack, married to Joy Behar with 30 children, stuck killing rats with toothpicks in a hotel for a living.
Tough call. I think that I'll stick with Emmy.

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