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22 September 2007 - The One Where Max makes another List

I think that Willie Nelson put it best when he asked "Living on the road, my friend, who's gonna keep you free and clean?"
Driving around in a campervan for extended periods of time, you learn new ways to occupy yourself. We played a lot of cards, except that when the car is moving, it's hard to keep the table in place. I wrote a good deal, except that when the car is moving, it's hard to keep the table in place. I read a good deal, except that when the car is moving, it's hard to keep yourself from upchucking.

But one day, we parked in Golden Bay and I just had time to sit with my thoughts and a piece of paper. What ended up in my binder was a list of things to do before I turn 30.

Things to do before you die is a) too morbid and b) too easy. It gives you 70 some odd years to cross everything off. This can make for some more grandiose items to check off, but 70 years is far too long if you want to go to Joshua Tree and rock climb.

I got the idea from Doctors John Dorian and Christopher Turk. Their lists included: get married, buy a house, learn difference between Senator and Congressman, sleep naked on a hammock, be a dad, invent a breakfast cereal, finish a triathlon. and have sex while playing Frogger. Mine is less sexual in nature (partly because there's the off chance that my relatives are going to read this and I don't want to mention any of my sexual proclivities), but still as ambitious.

So without further Apu, I give you
Things to do before I turn 30:
1) Run the LA Marathon
2) Be engaged at least once
3) Have at least two movies made
4) See Brooks and Dunn in concert
5) Visit at least 15 Major League Ballparks. So far I've only been to Dodger Stadium, Pac Bell Park (or whatever they call it), Anaheim Stadium, PetCo Park...and I think that's it.
6) Go to Alaska
7) Go to Europe
8) Make a pilgrimage to Graceland
9) Sky dive (and perhaps everything else that Tim McGraw lists in "Live Like You Were Dying," although I'm not too keen on loving deeper and speaking sweeter.)
10) Go to the San Diego Comic-Con
11) Go whaling
12) Go ice fishing
13) Get another degree on top of my B.A.
14) Catch a Marlin off the coast of Cuba
15) See a bull fight
(As you can tell, 14 and 15 are when I'm in my Ernest Hemingway phase)
16) Have a conversation with my father that doesn't involve sports, politics or movies
17) Ride a bull (preferably named Fu Manchu, preferably longer than 2.7 seconds)
18) Tour the best BBQ joints in the American South
19) Run with the bulls in Pamplona
(Sidebar: I'm not sure why, but I guess I have a fixation on bulls. Maybe I should add in "Have my picture taken with Horace Grant and Tony Kukoc.)
20) Be a contestant on Jeopardy
21) Sing "Don't Go Breaking My Heart" as a duet with my girlfriend at a karaoke bar

21 items in 10 years. So for the next decade, I plan on going on a My Name is Earlian quest (minus the Karma and Crab Shack) to cross off everything. This is a new chapter for YT. I think that everyone likes to make lists. If it weren't for this tendency, VH1 would have nothing to countdown, and therefore nothing to broadcast (apart from reruns of Hogan Knows Best). And then you have the movie that shaped my childhood, High Fidelity, in which Lloyd Dobbler constant ranks the top five songs to play on a monday morning, top five breakups, top five songs about death (Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald, Dead Man's Curve, but not You Can't Always Get What you Want), etc.
Needless to say, I list a lot. But this is the first time that I can actually do something with it.
And maybe if my attention span stays active for long enough, this blog'll become a shrine to my new list.
But probably not, since I'll lose interest long before that.


-MGD

"That's what she said" of the day:
(Re: A jar of frozen peanut butter)
Is it still stiff?

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