I was accosted today not once, but twice by the greatest parasites the world has even known: Greenpeace. They were parked around every entrance to Albert Park with their tie-dyed shirts, hacky sacks and burning flags. They were passing around petitions to save the whales or assassinate George W or find a constitutional right to clean bong water. Or maybe they were asking for donations to help fight global warming or to send to Al-Qaeda.
Either way, I wanted nothing to do with these damn hippies so the first time the hippie walked up to me, I did the "fake cell phone" excuse. I thought I was out of the woods, but then I decided to pass back through the park. Yup. Genius move on my part, because Greenpeace had set up their own embassy in the middle of Albert Park.
So instead of just saying "Not today" or "Best of luck" or just ignoring them, I took a page out of my father's book and went on a rant.
"I'm not signing your petition for the following four reasons. 1) I vote Republican. 2) Both of my parents drive SUVs. 3) Global Warming is a myth on par with Odin and unicorns. and 4) Al Gore deserved his Nobel peace prize like Elvis deserved his black belt."
For a second I thought about finishing with the patented Dr. Cox shoulder bump, but that might have sent the cadaverous Hippie into the next hemisphere.
I should also mention that I have added a new link to the bar to your right ------>
Katherine Spada, having added the 'Ganza to her own links page, has requested a little quid quo bro, and I have judged her offering to be acceptable. Check out her page. She's been referred to as a female version of myself, so if you're a fan of constant Arrested references, it may just be your cup of tea.
7:15pm on November 10th.
What is "When my flight leaves for LAX?"
-MGD
Max Davison is a Junior at Claremont McKenna College, majoring in Halo 2 and Entourage. He's in the sky tonight. There he can keep by your side, watching the wide world writhe. He'll be coming home next year.
Either way, I wanted nothing to do with these damn hippies so the first time the hippie walked up to me, I did the "fake cell phone" excuse. I thought I was out of the woods, but then I decided to pass back through the park. Yup. Genius move on my part, because Greenpeace had set up their own embassy in the middle of Albert Park.
So instead of just saying "Not today" or "Best of luck" or just ignoring them, I took a page out of my father's book and went on a rant.
"I'm not signing your petition for the following four reasons. 1) I vote Republican. 2) Both of my parents drive SUVs. 3) Global Warming is a myth on par with Odin and unicorns. and 4) Al Gore deserved his Nobel peace prize like Elvis deserved his black belt."
For a second I thought about finishing with the patented Dr. Cox shoulder bump, but that might have sent the cadaverous Hippie into the next hemisphere.
I should also mention that I have added a new link to the bar to your right ------>
Katherine Spada, having added the 'Ganza to her own links page, has requested a little quid quo bro, and I have judged her offering to be acceptable. Check out her page. She's been referred to as a female version of myself, so if you're a fan of constant Arrested references, it may just be your cup of tea.
7:15pm on November 10th.
What is "When my flight leaves for LAX?"
-MGD
Max Davison is a Junior at Claremont McKenna College, majoring in Halo 2 and Entourage. He's in the sky tonight. There he can keep by your side, watching the wide world writhe. He'll be coming home next year.
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