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17 October 2007 - All the little chicks with the crimson lips yell...

If all goes as it should (which a guy named Murphy says it won't), we're looking at a Cleveland/Colorado World Series. It's the sort of obscure matchup that makes baseball fans drool and conventional fans will shrug and ask "When does the NBA come back?"

But this is just another example of why John Q. Public has no idea what he's talk about and should be stricken of his first amendment rights. Why should they care about a 7 game set with Cleveland and Colorado?
1. The last time that the Cleveland Indians were this close to the series, Pedro Cerrano was whiffing at breaking pitches and Rick "Wild Thing" Vaughn was having problems with his control.
2. Some are calling it RockToberfest, which has become my second favorite Toberfest, just behind Scotchtoberfest (although according to Armen Tanzarian, there's no such thing).
3. We're going to see at least two games played in Mile High Stadium. What does this mean? For those of you with no clue how elevation works, being 5280 feet above sea level acts like a corked bat. So unlike pitcher's parks (a.k.a. No Homers club) we're going to watch Matt Holiday sock a god-awful number of dingers.
4. CC Sabathia. Just say that name and try to be sad. And then remember that he's 6'7" and 275lbs. It's like if Santa were black and had a 97mph fastball.
5. The Rocks have won 20 of their last 21 games. I mean, that's a stat line reserved for the Harlem Globetrotters or Denny Crane.
6. The milky voice of Joe Buck.
7. The Schrutian idiocy of Tim McCarver.
8. As opposed to last year's disaster of a World Series, Jeff Weaver will be nowhere near the field of play.

And if those 6 reasons aren't enough, then you obviously aren't a baseball fan. Which subsequently means that you hate America. So you can take your pinko sympathies elsewhere and stop reading right now. Otherwise I'll send Rick Monday to beat some patriotism into you.



Meanwhile, on the "Heroes" front, I for one am sad to see Nathan Petrelli shave off his playoff beard. I think that he pulled off the Ted Kasinski/Rob Brind'Amour look pretty well.
Mad props to Monica for busting out Rey Mysterio Jr's 619.
Also, I was ready to call it quits after the writing staff killed off George Takei. But they've redeemed themselves by casting Lt. Uhura herself, Nichelle Nichols, in the role of Micah's grandmother. Just bring in Leonard Nimoy and Walter Koenig for cameos and the show will become absolutely Shat-rageous.

Keep on rocking in the free world, my droogs.
-MGD

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